This afternoon, I finally pried myself away from my usual Sunday existence and went into the world. The world less than 5 miles from this very apartment called "the mall". I had exactly two purposes: to pick up more Epicurian cutting boards from Crate & Barrel and to spend my (ahem, Rodney and my) $25 Barnes and Noble gift card* on the Julia Child Mastering the Art of French Cooking books. As in the set of two. I planned to go all in on both those tomes of knowledge and wisdom.
When I left the mall, I had in my hands a left-hand golf glove (with aloe vera somehow built in and a cooling mesh on the top side) and a vegetarian cookbook. This, aside from the fact that I'm one hot mess socially, is why I don't "go shopping". I never get what I went for and it takes me 20 years too long to get what I wind up with. Plus I hate shopping. Do you think it's possible my hatred for shopping has anything to do with the fact that I don't get what I intended to buy and it takes forever? I don't think so. I hate it because nothing fits right. That's a diatribe for another day.
The book I picked up is Vegetarian Cooking for Everyone by Deborah Madison. I know, right? Who'd have thought I'd leave a store with this behemoth. It caught my eye as I scanned the vegetarian section. "Woo whee, big book; confident looking woman on cover...she's kinda hot...oh and there's the James Beard emblem on it," I thought to myself. I picked it up, sat down on a grossly lumpy chair and flipped through the massive book. So many sandwiches I'd eat, so many desserts I'd eat, so many side dishes I'd eat (nevermind those sides are meals). And there are pizza recipes? Ding, dang! Deborah's not all about eating sticks and dirt and weird junk I've never heard of! And the soy chapter is little! I love her!
When I arrived home and requested Rodney part from the garage to assist in unloading the groceries (I shopped my grocery list after leaving that mall world), I asked him to guess what I had in the Barnes and Noble bag. He played coy for a second and guessed "Julia Child's cookbook"? I whipped out that vegetarian book and saw, I'm quite certain, disappointment. Did he want duck confit? Did he want beouf bourguignon? Did he want French bread loaves the way Julia would have made them? Did Rodney want aspic molds? Or a book on Harley-Davidsons? Well too bad on all counts!
Rodney's gonna get cheese, apple and watercress sandwiches, cauliflower salad with green olives and capers as well as pizza margherita -- made from scratch. He better love them or Rodney'll never, ever, live this down.
Meat will win! Meat is what The Cook is made of!
Of course I'm kidding. At the very least, we'll have a wider variety of healthy sides to accompany our future hunks of beef and pork. You never know, I might enjoy being meatless. I highly doubt it, but you never know. Only time will tell.
Five bucks says this will be a no-go in less than a month. Who's in?
I'm just kidding! I'm sure this will work out just fine. Rodney and I will both learn a lot of our likes and dislikes.
Seriously though, I've got 5 bucks on going back to meat by March 14th. Email me.
*Thanks Kaner and those certain parents who contributed.
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